A New Chapter in Life

Sometimes changes and decisions are painful.....that was possibly why I was feeling kind of blue these couple of days. I said/ wrote some things I should not have.....consequences I never thought would inflict pain onto others....people I never would have hurt. I could have deleted the post...but I didn't....imperfection it may be....but a facet of life...it remains.

I'm glad I had my friend to confide in...had a little chat and things indeed do seem much brighter. There really are things that cannot be forced...sometimes in that moment of impulse.....my eyes do appear blind...but well...

I'm growing to accept my decision and heed the advices dispensed....to move on with life. Life is filled with trials and errors....guess not many do get it right the first time round.

I just hope that whoever reads this post....if there indeed is somebody....that the moment 22nd Nov'08...2230 may be short-lived but nonetheless etched deeply in my memory.

Life goes on...

Conflicted

Things happen.
Things change.
Mind's in a whirlwind;
and I'm conflicted on how to set things straight.

Emo-ing..........haiz

Never expected my blog to be read.....I sometimes wonder if I indeed should pour my sea of emotions into this.....

but then again.....why not ??....

I'm no exhibitionist......but merely a soul searching for his voice

I hope what I did was right...though doubts continue to reside within me.....

The Road Less Travelled

The day was supposed to spent shopping and chilling around with friends.....but guess I got a bit more than I bargained for.

I mean....after getting a drink of a bottle of white rum...vodka...cola and etc etc...as well as a free exploration trip of admiralty....many thoughts ran through my head as I began my journey home. I took the lesser travelled route...alighting a stop before I was supposed to....perhaps to sober myself up...perhaps to think through what my friend had said.....the stark realities of the life we live in.....something very unlike the world of idealism and perfection that I seemed to be constantly trapped within. I blamed myself for being perhaps a tad too obstinate.....too unemphathetic....too..................selfish perhaps.

It may seemed kind of coincident but the first song I had plugged onto my mp3 as I strolled home was David Tao's Ordinary Friends. Up till that moment, it never occured to me how much of a person I was...and up till that moment...the true meanings of the lyrics never resounded louder. Things happen for a reason...or least it is how I would choose to believe. Certain things cannot be forced and be made into the way one had always envisioned it to be.

I stand at a crossroad....uncertain to proceed and chase the ending I desire......or backtrack for I can seek comfort that there exist someone else who is better than I will ever be and offer more than I ever had....

There are some obstacles too insurmountable...even for the most optimistic....guess my friend perhaps know me better than I ever do.....

Life decisions are tough to make...results and outcomes of which never seem to be realised in the near future.....yet......

perhaps as long as I know that the other person will find happiness......
would I know that maybe the decision was painful but necessary.

I'm satisfied.